So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
