3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Randomize
