i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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