Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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