Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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