The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize