Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
