I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Is it penis luge time yet?
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
