yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
