We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
Randomize
