I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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