So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
