so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Randomize
