Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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