brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
