we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
Randomize