You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
We talked him into tasing himself.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
