Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
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