dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
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