Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
