Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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