plz talk dirty to me
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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