small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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