why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Randomize