We're facebook friends in real life
So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
time to smoke my breakfast
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
