In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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