i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
