using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
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