Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Randomize
