I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
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