got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I would ride that face into the sunset
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
