Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
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