chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
I think I sprained my soul last night
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Randomize
