it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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