"it" just moved
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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