so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Randomize