At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
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