I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
