I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Randomize
