put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I woke up and there is a food processor in my purse. Someone else's framed family photo. My front door is wide open and my gerbil is playing in the water bong.
Yeah I'm going to bathe him.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
