Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize