Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Randomize
