my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
