Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
