But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
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