Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
