I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
