Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
