Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Randomize
