who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
Randomize
